the last word.

today is 30th dec.
a day before new year eve.
a day before me getting ready to clean up my class room.
and the day my grandpa leave me=[.

this morning,my bro wake me up.he seldom do that.unless there's emergency.
i hate him waking me up.i rather his son(johnson) using his leg and kick my head calling my full name and wake me up.
i knew something bad happen.
but i din thought that serious.

he say...
wake up.grand pa pass away already.
i hate him for him making this joke.im very very angry and hate him.

so i stood up and searcd for my mummy.
and i saw her eyes were red. and she's packing.
and i know its all true of my grandpa leaving me.

i hate y grandpa cause leaving us with so much of memory.
i miss his loud voice
i miss his smile
i miss when he is talking
i miss everything of him.
i miss him using my room as his room when nobody wants to stay with him.

i hate myself of never talk to him.
i hate things happen to him before his death
i hate myself of being selfish

i would never forget what he always did on chinese new year.
his milo,his durian,his biscuit.

eventhough sometimes i only meet him once or twice a year,
but doesnt mean i dont know how much he loves us.
he cares for us and he never selfish for himself.

im honoured to be your grandchild.even im just a little girl for you.
im too honoured to be your most lovable daughter's daughter.

but you leave us without a word.
i dont want your money i dont want your harta.
we dont want it either.
because what we wants is your word and your breath.

i still remember the last word that i spoke to you is when you call mum
asking her to buy you your medicine.
you still sounds good that time.
and the second day.
you were still strong and sonuds firm.
but....
i hate to say bye whenever hang up calls.i hope i never hang up the calls.

i miss you grandpa.
tears-chia po.

pictures=]

ivan say this picture nice.(bcz he's the 1 hu set the angle and timer...) how lame.lunch time.eu yong is hungry.
ivan,waihow,chai,tang(eu yong)
he say its nice if i bend down and take picture.. what you think??
ivan lurve chai's shoes..lol!! actually chai wan stuck van's mouth v his shoe cz he sing non-stop.
the 3 gilaz...
whrs's ivan?
ta da... the 4 of us.. thnks to wai how for this nice shot=]
ops..haha!!
ivan:me.-half chai.haha!!
we are bro and sis not couple dun worry.
chai:me.
ivan:you wan YOU CHAR KUEY??
chai: O M G!!
silly chai..haha!!
he havent fully recover ever since he just came out from MENTAL HOSPITAL...haha!!
chai:van:me:how
ppl:tang,chai,ivan,me n how.
and i like this picture.i dont know why.
taken when at "ivan's house"
lastly..mamaking.hehe
outing of 26 dec at lucky ten.
the 3 guy..grrr..
how:chai:van
ivan tai sai.. wan me stand up and go his place then only can take pic v him...*grrrins*
me and how.
MY RM 300.00 PLEASE.
and me=]
owh.. this is xmas eve exchange prezzie.
yellow bikini from cui ting to sheena=]
jo try to fix it.and fit it..hehe
cerd get fen prezzie.
fen get mine.
but she say it doesnt suit her.
(maybe she dont like it=[)
jo get cerd prezzie.
and i get jo prezzie=]
i din upload lots of picture.. lazy of doing so.. hehe..
and ppl.. if you go bukit cahaya and see ppl walking around.. please dont STARE at them...
because the feeling's like.. grrrrrrr
O M G...haiz..

a typical SWEAT-SWT day.

26 dec 2008.i went erm outing v chai, wai how and piggy ivan.its dinner.
i wearing so so so proper and ivan say wan go Lucky ten at bbk.. fine then.. and there we go...
so they(chai & how) were "forcing ivan to go "bukit cahaya" lol.. and the kepoh aka me.. wanted to go since i havent go..lol!!*tell u readers a little dirty little secret later*
so they "approve" and let me go.
and badly WAI HOW owe me RM 300.because he spoiled my LEVI'S JEANS.

the next day(means today)
this moring.. i went bah kut teh v my family.. then by 1030... chai come fetch me.
so when ivan pass by a "yu char kuey" stall he ask to stop and chai bought it.
and also thanks to ivan cz bringing chai the wrong direction(eventhough he had been there twice within a week)


so we reach about 11.and they go rent bicycle.
piggy all of them force me to rent and ride but I DOWAN cz,,,,,,,,,,,
I CANT!!!(readers...dats my dirty little secret..hahah!!dont laugh!!)
and at last. i din rent
they cycle(eu yong,chai,wai how and ivan)
AND I WALK OF CZ!!!*grrr*
adn ive beel walking from 11 am to 3pm.
damm!!!
its like hot and gosh.
1st:swt come visit me
2nd:sweat come visit me.
3rd:swt and sweat come together-gether and visit me...lol!!

then we went 4 season hs.. nw is winter of cz..
and is 2degree to 7 degree

and then we "climb" to ivan house.

and then wai how FALL DOWN at ivan's ladder(lol...ivan house ladder)

what happen next?
oya.. we went 2nd time winter hs.. then we went HOME.

lol!! we go makan actually.. at bbk again.. pak li(luckily never kena saman.haha)

then i say wan go watch movie.

chickening chai nearly reach jj d then u turn say dowan go

KANASAI.

then.. we go kp.. since he say very long din go d.. then...

reach car park i say go bowling.but ivan come out v the idea of "dowan his middle finger gone..LAME)

then,, we sat INSIDE THE CAR ... and out of sudden...

**CAR-BOX**

lol... means sing inside the car...(the word come from greenbox) lol

i dont know which cleverguy come out v that idea.

so after quarelling v chai. we went down to the lift. before the lift open, we cabut telling the "lift spoil" so have to gojj and watch movie..lol!!

back to car me n chai continue quarrel..lalala..
and at las he go.

and i promiss him i will treat him..lol
actuallyhis "birthday present"=] sorry for the late..BUT BETTER THAN YOU.I DIN RECEIVE ANY PRESENT FROM YOU=[

and so ngam jo ask me go dinner. sorry but i cant.
before i reply u chai trying to call u you up and ask u to come but duno y cant get thru cz if he call ul know im with who tha's y i din reply you im with who..lol


and we watch IP MAN.
its a good show.

and PROBABLY we lok cute so they check our ic...#haha#
ppl.,.. i know that ul sure read in eng.
as in "AI-PEE MEN"

but actually the truth is

"yip-man"-read in cantonese.

lol!!! so lame...

then wai how come out from toilet and say he cannt pee and want to vomit.lol!! then we force him to mamak and i force him to drink "teh halia"

its good for u wai how.

then oya.i left out 2 things..lol...

1st...ivan's "birdy" let ppl SEE..hahahahahahahahaha!!!
he go toilet.then he ma peeeeeee lo.. (the many ppl together pee wan)

so came a chinese young guy stand beside him and look at ivan"s "pee-ing process"

OMG!!this is insane.. haha.. but its funny... and its crazeee...kesian ivan... pls dun night mare=]

2nd:i saw "XX" at bukit cahaya,, its surprising. IM SHOCK.bcz i never thought of meet him in such a place..lol!!

and.. ppl... i record ivan's concert-true voice when he sing at "his house" and ppl... its "crush by david.archu"

haha..*bluek*

anyway..im tired plus happie today.

thanks to ivan,thiam chai(bro),eu yong and lastly waihow(hehe).

toodles ppl.. il upload the picture soon.

...

i dont know what to type.also dont know how to start.
clueless..grrr..
and im so lazy to upload picture.next time ba.when my mood return...

so. sometimes i was thinking... am i wrong?
so means that i should stand at ppl's position and think?
alright... standing at ppl's position and think wasnt that bad.. BUT. im not ALWAYS WRONG!!

and.. was thinking .. let say.. if if IF .. i stand on ppl's shoes and think,
will the person do the same thing??
or only just using their mouth and think but never INTERPRET.
so.. its.. hm. WEIRD.

im not being cool, not acting on it, not playing around
and probably im too chong tong for the decision.
BUt.. the decision wont prove me wrong.
and so.. im waiting for this moment.
UNLESS there's such things as MIRACLE happens.

IM LETTING OFF SOMETHING.
officially.
seriously, ive been thinking about it quite long and quite often.
again and again.
non-stop.
at last, i come out with a very wrong and self-ish decision.
a decision that PROBABLY will ruin my friendship.
too bad.
im letting it go.unless she's AWAKE.
knowing what she's thinking and doing.

she's gt her own problem.i know.
and i wish to share with her.
too bad. i dont think so im the suitable person that she need to lean on.
so.. eventually i have to let it off.

from not-so good-friend become very-best friend then become good-friend and now
i think its only just-a-friend.

all the misunderstanding revolve around me.
a-non-stop wan.
was telling myself not to be so NAIVE.
not to be SOFT-HEART.
too bad...all this long i was being naive and soft heart.
cant god made/create our heart "hard"?

ya..again and again stepping into trap.
so isnt this is what they called life?lol...

time flew so quickly.
by telling myself not to think much and stop crying is impossible.
alot.alot of memory created by her running through my mind again and again.
even now.
trying to tell her/msg her.
but i couldnt do so. cz i dont know where to start/how to start and even how to end and where to end.
the best is keep it quite and let it be.
keeping quite is the best-for me.
as time pass by, truth will reveal.
and just let the time prove it.

and lastly,
im not always wrong.
please dont put the blame on me.

one year older one year wiser.

happie tang chuay people.enjoy a new year life=]
happy chinese new year in advance.

Attn: the 6 of us.

maybe ul feel bad/angry/pek chek on me or what so ever. but its ok.
i want to tell youll that this coming christmas eve which is 24 dec 2008,
our meet up will be CANCELED.
according to easy every body AND avoid of being ME scold/look at ppl's face,
i wish to stop this coming meet up and own do own celebration.

cerd, you can go celebrate with your cousin aka jie already.
fen , you can go celebrate with your family/relative already.tmr(25 th dec)
can go work in normal condition.
shin , you can go celebrate with ting or family.(ur sis is coming back.perhaps you can go celebrate with her if you wish)
jo , you can go celebrate with your coll fren/cousin/family ady
ting , you can stay at home and celebrate liau.your mum wont so wory.

i hope every1 will be very satisfy on this "PLAN"

anything please leave comment here.

cheers,
susin

today.no title.

lol...he's name is pow pow.. he is 4 this year.. today is the 1st day he join my house dolly member..hehe.. yaya.. he is the 8tv "mascod"...lol...

my bro get this actually.. according to his anual dinner.. his secretary gave him this.. its actually the secretary husband.guess who is he? lol.. he's the dj of hits.fm...
i not so sure his name is JJ or RUDY..basically he is.. abit fat.. and he is indian.. and he is botak..keke!! thanks..powpow is cute=]
but my bro feel weird of receiving this "special" xmas present..lolok.. proven i go library n LEPAK..haha!!
worst.. i went today.. abit early.. 1030.. 1pm the ppl there say close..gosh.. i din bring fon how to called back home? so ended up borrow from the ppl there... thanks=]
ok.. im not siau of posting this BELL here.. those PROPERTIES belong to MISS LIM.haha!!in order of shout(which is rude) in class asking the student to keep quiet.. so she bought this to kept us silent..lol..
IT WORKS=]
nah.. the siauz...
after tuition.. went sp v cerd and jo...so..
this is cerd..eh.. sorry.. its ching woon... huh? wrong again?okok.. i think she is jo...hm...
huh?! wrong again? so who is she?
okok.. she's si kut tau..lol!!
this is me.. yaya.. i went plastic surgery... so.. i become so slim.. pls ppl.. dun say im FAT already k?ergh!!
(actually the picture is jo aka tau kak ka tio) haha!!

sushi zanmai.. ppl.. i miss the food there.. thanks to cerd bring me go=] its freaking CHEAP...so go ppl and fill ur tummy ops.. stomach there=]

ok.. enough of yummy..
xmas is around the corner..MERRY CHRISTMAS IN ADVANCE people=]
and i saw this actor.. she's.. tvb punya actor..(i duno her name)
actually.. yesterday go sp main is to accompany cerd buy new year cloth.. and also jo la of cz.. at last.. me this no$ gal buy the most.. i bought 2 shirts again. 1 mng purple/meron shirt and 1 vest..lol!!

cerd bought 1 tube dress at roxy...its expensive but ok la.. she can afford..hehe!!
SHE RICH MA..forget to inform.. her daddy give her RM500 for shopping yesterday..and her mummy add RM50 again..omg rite??
ppl.. go rompak her nw..lol..jkjk

we walk from freeking 6 hours at sp... erm... from 3pm to 10 pm..lol!!! imagine you are wearing sandals and walk for the freeking 7 hours... take my mia only..but its ok.. happie good.
so.. i search for my -going to buy nike shoes..lol!!i found that.. but no $ to buy=[!! i want that shoe!! its nice.. its white with gold nike mark on it.. haiz.. it cost..rm...229..yaya..229..hm.. will bring my mum there..

and jo found her loveble jeans at levis...it cost... 240 if im not mistaken.. really nice when she wear it.. most importantly she feel comfortable.. and i can 100% SHE LIKE/LOVE IT ALOT!! also.. the guy that serve us.. hm.. he is.. hm.. yummy.. delicious..lol.. handsome actually... and.. ok.. i smell fishy..lol..il stop it!!*kaka*

left out.. jo bought a shirt at asia avenue..lol!! its expensive but really nice.. trust me. its nice=]
and...so.. we went around and see seeeeeeee...

so i saw this shop out of all sudden..the shop name is.. the dots.. it creats a legend for us(me jo n cerd).. know why??
il tell you..

me:eh.. go there c lo...
cerd,jo:kia la..

so.. cerd is on my left and jo on my right.. i look deeply so i bent down abit(cz i cant see according to my eye situation)

so.. so.. so.. jo also bend.. i duno how on earth she bend... i suddenly i heard "BEAAAAAAAAG"!!!...
OH MY AMITHABHA-ALHAMLULIHAH-AMEN

IT FREAKS ME OUT!! i tot what happen...
i could not talk on that moment.no words can come out from my mouth.i really want to speak but i cant i dont know why...
BECAUSE on that super very moment,
i ONLY CAN LAUGH OUT MY LUNGS!!

me & cerd goes WAKAKAKAKA-HAHAHAHAHA-MUAHAHA-WUKAKA-WIKAKA-MOHAHA-LUKAKA-
ZEEKAKA-
BEKAKA-BUKAKA-hahahahaha...

for that super very 2min.the whole situation on asia avenue is ok the "hahaha" which my voice and cerd voice flattering around..
ops.im wrong
no voice no laughter.only air.cz its too funny.no sounds to be produce.
got la.. 1 miserable and random sound which produce by jolyne. not 1 is 2..
a) *baaaaeeeng*
b) OUCH!!

IM HALF TYPING HALF LAUGHING TIL NOW.

and for the rest of the going-on shopping.. il be the 1 who produce-haha noice.

its so SUPER FUNNY!! haha!! kesian jo..
the whole asia avenue ppl was looking at her.. even got two guys shake their head bcz they too feel _omg_ for jo... haha

oh!!forgot.. the ppl who working on the "the dots" shop...i think he is the owner.. he is kinda abit chubby and wearing smart and the most important he is ON PHONE.
haha
imagine what he will respond on jo's-happening? haha..
cerd imagine
a)jump out from chair and find for aid box.
b)OMG
c)after finish on phone(he ask to hang up call 1st cz got some reason) he laugh like nobody else on earth...
haha
i still cant imagine how funny was that. and it happens right beside me! gosh...
haha

full of laughter and tired and leg pain shopping day.

what you wear sometimes really affect your mood.it too reveals your personality.
lastly...
what we wear really can change our very own fasion statement.

p.s.dont laugh at jolyne lau huey shien anymore.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

email...

ive made up my mine.ad ive email him right before i offline.
and.
i checked my mail box from the start i switch on my laptop.
ive got his mail.
he replied.
im happie!!=]
but at the same time im sad.=[

and im not crazee.

i think its time to change.

no pic.writing.

i was still deciding.. whether to send that mail or ont.. ive been thinking and thinkind.. he's back today.. shall i?? haix..this is crazee..

i cannot understand what am i thinking actually..im out from 11 til 7 today.. at hict library.. super lonely super silent but at least i get to study.=]im happie.
tmr will be another day for me to spend at hict library.
i think il get my self 1 spec asap.cz i cant see the writing anymore.haiz!
now suppose to be at cheras pasar mlm.. too bad no car.. *grrr* its ok la.. next time ba=]

and i think i better get myself a new memory card for MY BRAIN.yea...MY BRAIN.cz im losing my memory.. dun say study.. funny conversation that i want to blog in i also forget.. lol

actually i only remembered few..the PERVERT 1
lol.. im not but cui ting aka rooftop is/are..lol!!
she will get excited when talk bout up up down down..hahah!!
its at.. erm mc i think..ya. mc d.. we were talking bout long. then suddenly rough suddenly ting come up with
EXPAND AND STAND UP(with action she show her finger)
people.. nah.. this is cut ting..lol!! dont think she's xi xi man man.. she is a tiger actually..hahah!!!
when i say she is.. i really meant it..hahaz!!

lol!! then come all those.. hm.. when there is cui ting.. there is... HAMSAP conversation...

ok.. another 1...
ting : i later wan go back home to take "chuo aii" to exchange with the pasar malam ppl...
me,shin,cerd,jo,fen:WHAT?you want to MAKE LOVE with pasar malam people?(nah.. i was just creating it)
suppose to be

ting: later i wan go exhange "zuo aii"
5 of us: what?! what MAKE LOVE?! YAYA.. there's ting.. back to normal.. she's high again!! hahah!!

and yeah... the "THE " day we are facing.. this pop out when we talk bout cerd aka si kut tau blog.. her title"the cave" lol..
so we started and ENDED with the "the" too...
the toes.. the hair.. the blog.. the picture.. the water.. the mc d.. and the NIPPLE...
ya.. started by ting again.. there she go...

clipping with the hair clipper(paperclip) to clip on ppl breast.. ops.. nipple.. lol!!

ok.. people who under 18.. dont learn / practice this at home.. those action need consultation...lol!!

and.. seriously.. meeting BECOME OUTING..
lol.. same same la.. still got 'ing-ing' ma right??hheheeee...

really have fun actually..
and IM BROOK!!!!pls ppl...im so kesian=[

this fri-outing to sunway again..hn.. probably will have dinner at "zen mai".. still planing=]

actually.. lots more to write.. too bad.. i really lazy and forget..

ps.. wen..s t o p saying sorry.. hehe.. cz im the 1 who should say sorry=]

oh.. i get complain..from my didi..TEE THIAM CHAI.. happie belated burthday..hehe.. when will you be coming back? really miss you and hope can meet up soon=]

and i msg kah keen(my senior).. he was asking too..how come "kim hong" wasnt inside your blog.."
lol.. i know i ans him rudely.. i replied.." why should i?"
haha!! i dont mean it actually=]

and yea.. here is kim hong..
i too text him today.. asking him how he is.. thanx to him.. he ask me to chill out and ENJOY my last year of schooling day.. hehe... ok... il take your advice..

play hard and study hard=]

i think i will email him after i finish this post.
i cant able to lost him.. ppl said.. chill.. still got 1 year.. but to me.. only half year.. cz june junior will come and register already... this aint good sign(girl junior)..
know what i mean right?hm..

but back to faith.. not mime means not mine.
il let him know rather then keeping it inside....

still.. should i?

meeting?NAH!!haha

this is what we called meeting.now you believe what's called meeting?bah!!haha!! nothing special... its better.. we never sleeepppp as usual..haha!!cerd's result.. SO CHA!!!!sau pei la..haha!!
back to my house.. and this is what had happen to my bed and my room.. kesian me.. wakaka!! ntg happen actually=]

when jo is preparing.. when cerd is testing..hehe
actually.. she's not insane... she's just a little bit of crazy.. yaya.. CRAZEE!! haha.. she's staring at me actually cz i tease her.(i forget what ive said)
my leg cerd hand.. haha!! terbalik sorry.. my leg cerd hand...oh? terbalik again..okok.. my hand cerd leg.. im correct now dont i??
ya.. another insane.. ops!! sorry.. crazee..hehe!!but it looks really nice.. i like this picture..hehe!!hair clip?nah!!paper clip..
the SIX OF US=]
hah!! there we go.. ing-ing.. rooftop,smalleyes,big mouth,pdi supporter..lol!!
thanx to fen 4 this pic=]
im.. er.. im... er...haha!!hate this picture!!but fen look nice..hehe
si kut tau.. ops.. its te bu and me..haha!! looking at another camera actually=]
yaya.. thanks to jo!!*grr*
looks yummy? it is.. but when you "make" it.. it was like.. *ergh*
"get high get high"!!fir!!
"put ur hands up!put ur hands up!"lol
fen ting jo shin sin cerd
the blurz..
oh??ya!! regarding to this!! i want to complain!! i cannot "sing out loud" according to the stupid glass..grrr actually cannot hear from outside de la..hm..
fen ting jo
ops!! me n cerd.. whr's shin?
ans...lost in space=]