controlled but fail miserably...

i DONT KNOW HOW TO DO . i feel so miserable. im stuck with the situation. een its only 45 min during the situation... but it makes me feel like im dragging 45 years.... u wont understand the feeling unless you're in me , myself.
i hate the feeling. and i cant express out. i tot i will get over it. but it get worst
.. it affects my mood affects my emotions.
because i cant do anything much to change the situation.
T.T

i know youre human. dats y im throwing question to you. too bad, you make it ntg happen. fail . com cause its so obvious. so so so obvious until blind wan can notice it.

you're very different now. way different from last time. like u always say , MAYBE our frenship is just so shallow.

what's the point if only u und me and i dont und you? im telling you everything and you dont? its just the same as "one sided love". so.. if la you notice, i dont speak anymore. thought of giving you less burden and share some of yours with me... lol.. pls laugh out loud. cause im stupid doing so.

im used to you being with me.
used to you being so so so close with me.
not even a little gap is filling up the space.
now? even an elephant can fit into the space.
u dont speak. no nobdy can understnad you. is you yourself dont let ppl und you. and ve told u since last time.
over confident in you. not dependent in you.
it irritates me . i feel guilts when youre helping me all the time. you make me feel so worthless and helpless.
sometimes, i just hope dat theres a day i could help you.
it seems like owh. its impossible.

im just being me. getting frust up and FUCK up when u keep quite when something is wrong.
maybe im just too kepoh.
if concern towards you is something wrong , i apologize.

because u said " i no need concern".
its not me taking words too seriously. cause i dont see the point of me being a clown so care towards you. and u just said "nothing".